How We Met

After a couple failed marriages (Kathryn writing), I dated various guys for about a year, then in Feb 1981 I realized I didn't care if I married, or even dated, I was content. I actually said "OK God, I've got the message, you don't have marriage in mind for me."

Then, 19 Jun 1981 God rewarded that acknowledgement when I attended (literally a last minute thing) the "reunion" put on by a commercial enterprise (Million Dollar Baby Enterprises) that was held for classes of '60 through '70. Dave ('63) and I ('66) both showed up about 9:15, and went through the "I remember you, but can't remember your name" routine, then "where's your wife? well we're divorced, where's your husband? well, we're divorced" and after seeing each other every night for a week admitted we were in love. A year later to the day we married. I found out later that he had wanted to date me way back when I was in high school, but thought that I was dating a particular guy exclusively (which I wasn't, though *mostly* him). Anyway, we had both changed a lot through the years and figure that if we *had* dated then, we might not have made it since both our interests had changed a lot.

The reunion was on Friday. I almost didn't go. My mother and I had both been on a diet similar to Jenny Craig, where you buy only the diet place's food, so we hadn't been to the grocery store in a couple weeks. Sunday was Father's Day, and even though my folks were newly divorced, it was amicable and we went to the store to buy all the makings for the family dinner to take place. Next door was a bank with one of those time/temperature/message signs. There was a message about this multi-year reunion taking place that night. I commented that it would have been fun to go to if I didn't already have plans to go see "The Hiding Place" that night at a church in next town. It was a 2 reeler and by intermission I remembered all about it (I'd seen it before), and kept thinking about that reunion. So, at 8pm, I left, went home and changed into formal dress, and headed for the Hilton.

Dave almost didn't go, either. He had a bifurcated divorce. The divorce was final in 1980, but the custody case was still lingering (ultimately 50-50), so he was still on the "every other weekend and alternate Wednesdays" routine. That weekend was his weekend, and he didn't want to miss out for a night. He lived next door to his parents and his mother told him to GO!!!, that they were capable of keeping their grandchild for one night, and he would be in bed anyway. Hence the 9:15 arrival of each of us.

The romantic part wasn't the proposal, it was the week between the reunion and a week later with the acknowledgment that we were in love (yes, that fast). About 2am when we were leaving the reunion, he asked me to go out on Sunday after he took his son back to his ex. I already had a date for Sunday. But it was a first date with someone I knew from a train club, and it was a half hearted date in the first place. I talked with that guy Sunday afternoon, and somehow (purposely) worked the conversation around so that breaking the date was mutual. I immediately called Dave and asked him if he still wanted to take me out that night. So, we went out Sun, Mon, Tue, Wed, Thu, Fri, and then on Sat the 27th, we went to The Variety Arts Center where I was a charter year member of Society of the Preservation of the Arts. It was a sister club to The Magic Castle, one brother President of one, another brother President of the other.

Two pictures are important to my story. The balcony above the sign saying Theatre in this picture and this theater, which was at that time 99seat and called Tin Pan Alley. The balcony is outside Tin Pan Alley. We went to the show and during intermission were out on the balcony. One of us (can't remember which) said "this only happens in the movies" and the other said "love at first sight". Though we had met in high school, we didn't really know each other, and the one time we'd met in the intervening years (at stage teacher's retirement), we'd been with our respective spouses. So really, the reunion was our "love at first sight".

It was either Thanksgiving or Christmas when Dave formally asked my dad for my hand in marriage. The first place we thought of for our wedding was Tin Pan Alley. We asked President Milt, explaining we were on a tight budget and couldn't pay much. He was so tickled with the idea that we weren't charged anything. The whole wedding cost $200; including my and my sister's formal gowns, my families sodas from the "bar", and a tip to the bartender. Dave had a tuxedo as he was an officer in the Elks lodge.

After the wedding, the "reception" was the first show that evening featuring "Willio and Phillio the 20th Century Troubadors". They knew that the first show was a wedding party and geared the show toward us. One of our 75 guests was a neighbor with a video camera (a bulky thing in those days) so we have both the wedding and the show (since converted to DVD). The fun ending to it is that his batteries went dead right after Willio and Phillio played The Anniversary Song for us to dance to. The theater wasn't really set up for dancing and by that time most of the guest were ready to go home. About a dozen of us then went upstairs to the ballroom to dance to Art Deco and His Society Orchestra, 6 year old son having gone home with his grandparents.

We came home to the tree and our front yard being "TP'd" though our friends did a great job with the tree being TP'd only on the lower branches that were easy to clean up, and the TP on the yard was laid out in a symmetrical lacy pattern. Just wish we've gotten pictures as it was really pretty. Next day, we took son to Marineland for our "honeymoon" as a new family, and by the time we got home, the TP had been cleaned up.